What makes a good friendship? Are there set rules for friendship? Some of the biggest publications in the USA, including Psychology Today, give us lists of qualities we should choose our friends by. But are these really the deciding factors? OR is there more to it than just qualities?
I feel that we choose friends for a lot of different reasons. Some are friends of convenience; who can gain what from whom? Some are friends of influence; look at who I know. Some are friends for cover up or protection; can’t let those secrets get out. Some are just acquaintance; a quick hello or cup of coffee. But the people we call best friends are the ones that hold our hearts the closest; they share the tears, the joys, the laughter and the pain of our very hearts.
We have all kinds of friends for all kinds of reasons. And we keep them at varying distances from ourselves in order to safe guard the true knowledge of who we are inside. Let the wrong one in at the wrong trust level and our lives can be shattered in seconds by betrayal, threats, harassment, broken promises, or many kinds of cruel words or deeds.
Some people have lots of friends for different reasons. Some have few friends at only one or two reasons. But sooner or later most of us have at least one true best friend that we trust and allow into our lives at the deepest levels our being. And what a GIFT that it!